THE WRECK ; re-visited 105

          Returning to her room, Kamala indulged in a long spell of meditation ; she wondered what Nalinaksha's glances at her had conveyed and what what his opinion of her was. His eyes had seemed to lay   bare all her secret thoughts. There was something to be said for the old days when she remained in seclusion when he was about. Now she was constantly finding herself in embarrassing situations ; it was a sort of punishment for concealing her identity.
        She went to bed that night determined that she would seize the first opportunity to disclose her secret next day and that she would accept the consequences.
        She rose early in the next morning and bathed ; she brought back with her a small jar of Ganges water, as usual, washed and swept out Nalinaksha's room before taking up any other work ; but this morning she found him already occupying the room, contrary to his normal custom.
         She slowly walked up to his room stood outside the door. What was that possessed she could not tell herself ; the whole world swam before her in a mist and she had no consciousness of the passage of time.
       Suddenly she became aware that Nalinaksha had emerged from the room and was standing before her. In an instant Kamala sprang up, knelt before him, and bowed her head till it touched his feet ; her loose hair, wet from the bath, fell all about and covered them to the instep. Then she rose again and stood before him like a statue ; she forgot altogether that her veil had fallen nor did she perceive that Nalinaksha was gazing steadfastly and intently at her face. She was quite unconscious of external things when suddenly a flash of inspiration darted through her brain, and without a tremor in her voice she said, "I am Kamala."
         No sooner had she spoken than the sound of own voice seemed to break the spell and her concentrated purpose dissolved. She trembled in every limb and her head fell forward ; she could not stir a step and yet flight seemed her only salvation. She had expended her whole strength and staked her all on the utterance of those three words, "I am Kamala," and on her prostration before Nalinaksha. Nothing was left with which she could cover her shame. She had thrown herself on Nalinaksha's mercy.